Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Don't Taste the Rainbow

What I've Learned Recently

1. Something about X-Men.

Wolverine. Is two Batmans. About to kiss.

2. Something about a "Rainbow Dick."

"Blah blah blah blah rainbow dick."

"Wait, what?"

"Rainbow dick."

"Yeah, I heard that, but I wasn't listening to the beginning of the conversation."

"It's when a group of girls all wear different colored lipsticks and go down on a guy."

"Wait...they all go down on one guy?"

"Yep, then he has a rainbow dick."

"I'm so confused."

"You know, cause the lipsticks make ---"

"Yeah yeah yeah, I get that part, I just don't get why this term even exists."

"Apparently some girls do that."

"WHAT?! I would never do that. But if I did - not that I would - but if I had to, I'd be red. Then at least I could go first and avoid all of the germs."

"But what if red goes last? I mean which way does the rainbow go if it's on a dick?"

"That's a good question...I'm not sure."

"I'm not sure, either."

"Well of all the things to be unsure about, I'm content with this one. Hopefully I don't ever know which way the rainbow goes."

"True. But you'll never look at Skittles the same way again."

3. Something about Biggie Smalls

He died. Sixteen years ago.

4. Something about this blog post

I learned less than I thought I had when I started writing this.

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